Projection

There is actually nothing wrong about acting like you know a lot of things. But the danger lies on the fact that people of equal wit recognize who among the crowd is projecting. Sooner or later, they come to discover who is fake or who is genuine.

The fake ones are easy to spot. When discussions start to go deeper, they are the ones who start plucking ideas from the air, making themselves look foolish unknowingly. 

Being an intellectual is one thing. Acting like one is another. The latter is empty inside, full of embellishments and lies from the outside. 

With my job as a journalist, I have come across a lot of people of equal intellect, talked to them with depth and substance, so genuine to the core.

Multitudes of subject pour out naturally, and exchanges of thoughts and ideas through discourse happen with fluidity.

Projection reeks of insecurity. What the person lacks inside, he makes up for the external cover-up, perfecting a mask he can use to fool anyone into believing he is one of the intellectuals. But without natural proof to back it up, without the necessary credentials to show for it, no matter how you act, you are just as fake as anybody does.

People will always notice. Genuine intellectuals have got a history of credentials behind them to show for it. They need not fake interests in philosophy, politics or even choose a crowd to append some resemblance of truth in the image that they have. They let these proof speak for what and who they really are. They never seek external validation nor shop around hungrily for accolades.

Genuine intellectuals are confident enough they are, because they don't act that they are. It comes naturally. It shows naturally. The brilliance in them emanates from the inside without any effort. Once they talk, you knew.

And so becoming an intellectual need not projection at all. If you are, you just have to be. Be yourself and the wit will surface. No need for any projection. 

Good job!

Okay. here's the deal. stay out of trouble..err.. i mean stay clear of bad vibes, and the positive energy will come in and, voila! you're doing a good job.

Trust me. when i said avoid these bad energies, you really have to. i just did. and looked what happened. over the weekend, not just a couple of good things happened.

for one, my thesis proposal was officially approved by my professor. so i'm gonna be jumping over to the next step, that is, write down the abstract, attached at least 10 related journals and i am off to graduate school this week for the director's approval. smooth sailing, huh?

so, what else came in? i wasn't able finishing my story on the launching of Louis Poulsen and the opening of Bulthaup kitchen showroom along Ayala, but I am actually in the process of incorporating the interviews. and guess what?

another story popped up. two stories in a row! ain't bad for a busy bee like me, right?

so what exactly am i talking about? well, bad vibes. sound familiar? i really ain't good at dealing with the "past."

some people who may think they can just leave and then come back for their own benefit aren't good for you at all. have you been in a situation when all things about you are going well, and then somebody just got in the picture and somehow messed things up? or you're going through a rough time in your relationship, and somehow, someone managed to catch your attention and distract you? then you should know better. you should know who's worth it, and who's not.

why? because, sometimes, a real relationship just needs mending, though some really have to go. but believe me. first, pay attention onto how make things work, before finally leaving someone and let somebody in right away. 'cause chances are, you might be choosing the wrong one.

so, just say NO to the bad vibes those kind of people bring and stick to the one who loves you better. FRIENDSHIP is not even a reason to let someone who let you down come back and what? ruin your peaceful life with the right one, again?

just. say. NO. and with that, you're doing a good job.  

vindication

my life has resumed normalcy. by normalcy, i meant picking up where i left off: back to being an optimistic and normally happy person again.

i actually love life. i do. and i enjoyed doing different things, too, while having a secure job and getting to hang out with my family for quality time occasionally.

i didn't actually expect things to fall into place perfectly this year. i actually started out hitting some snags first quarter of 2013, but i am proud to have survived.

but the most surprising one is a personal issue i have been dealing with for the last three years, since 2010.

this month, i just got vindicated. and as much as i wanted to laugh out loud now, i could not do it just the same. all i feel is pity for someone who used to taunt me, trying to ruin my name.

i found the last piece of the puzzle by braving getting embarrassed in talking to someone who doesn't even know me. turned out, she held the key of this puzzle, and things just clicked.

i had long wanted the truth to be out about this person who tried putting me down. and now that the truth is out, i feel so vindicated. seemed like a heavy patch of cloud had been lifted and finally things were bathed in a bright light.

so to that good-hearted beautiful lady who is getting married soon, "thank you, from the bottom of my heart. i know God is looking out for you, that's why He blessed you with another man, instead. may you remain the same and be happy with the one who loves you forever." :)

what inspires you today? what are you thankful for?

i would be publishing "what inspires you today" everyday in this blog and "what are you thankful for."

though i was having a writer's block as of the moment, what inspires me today is the thought of my thesis proposal. i find it very interesting and seeing it to the very end till graduation inspires me a lot as of late. it's something that motivates me in going further though my busy schedule seems to stop me from putting all the details.

what am i thankful for?

i am thankful that i have been healthier this month. though life has been so very busy for me the past few days, i found my body being resistant to diseases lately. in fact, i have been overdoing things a little bit for the past few weeks. and given my tight schedule, exercise has been written off my busy schedule and days-off don't even mean a well-rested day for me. days-off usually go to chores at home, doing grocery-shopping or rushing a story due the next day.

i am also thankful that i could still think creatively for my thesis every night after work even in the midst of a demanding job that entails a lot of pressure and story deadlines. the truth is, back in my early days in this job, i don't thrive in a pressure-driven demanding job. and i am thankful that given this kind of lifestyle, i could still think clearly for my thesis proposal.

what about you? what inspired you today? what are you thankful for, as well?


 

dream job

if money would be no object and you can do whatever you want, what will you do for the rest of your life?

try asking that question again, and i would answer i'd love to be a writing traveler or vice versa (traveling journo). 

But being a travel blogger or a globetrotter even is exactly what I want. Traveling the world and writing about it or even documenting each journey would be the perfect job for  someone who's always restless but never found the time to do it due to lack of funds and due to my dayjob.

imagine discovering diverse cultures, meeting people of different descents, learning from them, and exploring other places and later on, other countries. ain't this job close to perfect?

we don't always get to choose the job we want. only new grads have this option. at least they can still jump from one company to another. but once you've grown familiar to the people you've work with, comfortable with the working environment you are in, leaving your present job is really really hard. 

that is where you have started. that is the place where you have gained footing as part of a workforce. that's the place where you have grown as a professional. that is the place you call "home" second to your real one, or "family" next to your own.

so what then? 

well, the best job isn't always the one you think it is, or, if it is, you don't always get to do that at the time you want it so bad.

the best job is one that brings out the passion in you, something that doesn't make you feel working at all. after all, everybody gets stressed out at work sometimes.

so, if you don't see yourself doing you dream job anytime soon, at least do not lose sight of it. perhaps the timing isn't so right. maybe you will get to do it much later in life. :)

how to start a project in interior design

MIDWAY through my basic course in interior design, a number of projects popped up and prospective clients began making calls and inquiries, asking me if I can redo the interior of their living spaces. 

I had wanted to but i turned down most of them, and chose a select few i felt I could handle well enough. in between going to school and accepting projects, i have learned one thing: experience is still the best teacher. there are just some things that you wouldn't learn within the four walls of a classroom. getting schooled for real is getting your self out there and experience "life" for real.

consider a prospective client who made a demand for a site visit. three of us drove to her place for a consultation work and did an ocular check on the location. at the end of the day, we thought we have nailed it, only to find out the next day, we have all ended up empty handed. 

talk about expecting too much when a "verbal agreement" doesn't even mean a done deal. so  the first thing designers must do?  lay down a CONTRACT and get the client to sign. 

trust me. a WRITTEN CONTRACT would save you from a lot of disappointment later. never accept a consultation work without a written contract or do an ocular visit at your cost when all that the client does is talk, cause when it all seems good, you'd find at the end that it is the other way around.

we've spent almost nine hundred pesos each for that project for nothing. when the client was done "stealing" our concepts and figured she could do away with the designers’ fee after getting some help from Internet resources, that was when she decided she need a designer no more.

i kinda felt ashamed. i brought up that prospective project to two of my friends. well, i can do nothing but apologize. effort exerted, gas and money all went down the drain. Should have known better.

so here's a tip for budding interior designers: PUT ALL AGREEMENTS INTO WRITING. whatever, it is that you've agreed upon regarding the fees and services, make sure you have a contract at hand. it will save you from a lot of disappointments later. trust me.

dogs: man's bestfriend

i don't mean to offend anyone, but i could not stand keeping mum over it or stay a silent witness to a dog's meaningless death either. i could never keep it to myself.

in fact, it is none of my business and i am not even a dog lover. but i've seen the ugliness of human's cruelty to animals.

last night was one when you wish you could have done something but failed to stop "crazy" people from killing a dog. i couldn't have cared less, but the sight of a fallen dog, bloodied and gasping for breath, as it lay dying on the ground, was heart-rending. what's worse, that bald-headed, stocky man kept on striking the helpless dog with a big knife, as he "slaughtered" him to death like a butcher man.

I cringed at every strike, my heart wrenched as blood started spurting out of the dog's neck. and all i could do was watch from the window of my apartment on the fourth floor, peering down at a helpless dog as people gathered to cheer on the killer.

what a nasty sight. a dog need not die over striking another dog. they could have threatened the dog away. but kill him? how barbaric can people get?

i have fully recovered over that scene. the next day while off to work, i have seen the blood stain on the street leading to my office, and the picture of the guy striking at the dog flashed in mind once again. i can't fully comprehend the cruelty of people to animals. isn't that dogs are truly the bestfriend of humans?

i have heard of some saving their owners' lives from drowning or even incidents of fires. others have defended them against thieves or robbers. i find it killing a dog to save another dog isn't justifiable. 

so here i am, putting my disappointment to words. it would do the dog's death justice at the very least, and so that others would know. so for all the dog killers out there, i have a message for you. Shame on you!  

Of changing jobs and soul-searching

I haven't done much since I have gotten back from a 3-day furlough in Laoag, Ilocos Norte. That city up north was a good respite from a hectic schedule that makes life on the go a little more stressful.

I don't intend to get lazier every passing day, but since I have gotten back, I felt more inclined to do nothing at home but laze around, eating, sleeping and watching DVD marathons all day.

I was supposed to go to UST Graduate School last Saturday to enroll for my last year in my MBA. But I made use of the 10-hour bus ride back to Manila a good excuse not to wake up early, sank deeper under the covers and slept weariness away. 

Boredom is eating away at me again. I need to work on something new to get me "up and moving." The feeling of stagnation is one of the things that I detest. But motivation has not kicked in yet. And this boredom does seem like a quicksand that sucks me in. I preferred to be a couch potato, sitting in front of the TV, munching popcorn in my pyjamas while sporting a disheveled hair all day.

I don't know. Maybe it comes with age. As you grow older, your body tends to move slower. Oh, well. I could use a lot of excuses. But I don't even have the body of an obese to justify my laziness.

When you are caught in stagnation, you are thrown into a web of indecision. A lot of what ifs stop you to get out of the rut and just settle in where you are.

For somebody who has been with the Inquirer for over a decade, changing jobs is out of the question. Getting out of the confines of your security blanket feels so scary, and the uncertainty of the unknown that lies before you would look like a thick fog of doubt that you can't get through.

Taking the first step weighs on you enormously, like shaking up the whole world that you have lived in for most of your life. That little drop of change creates ripples that somehow, create a domino effect or a wave even. And the moment you discover you took the wrong turn, it will send your life into a downward spiral.

Leaving your present job is always a gamble. It needs laying down the pros and cons, and evaluating which better way to take. 

And just like the others who go on vacations for a soul-searching, I came back more confused and undecided.

So, yes. I will give myself a break. I won't go anywhere today. I'll sleep some more, do some DVD marathons, and continue sporting a disheveled hair.    

blessings

last time i called home, my big brother broke the news. they are having their second baby. but what doubles the blessing that God has showered us early this year is his reappointment for his work.

i was overwhelmed with joy this afternoon. i have my prayers answered. it has gotten me teary eyed for the good news. i have been praying for almost 2 months now but i never get tired praying. and now, this.

praise God for He is so good to us. indeed, Lord Jesus has been with us in trouble or in good times. keep the faith and keep on praying for the desires of your heart.

for He always gives back what we lost threefolds or even more :))